Sports

Sports is a substitute for war, in a way, which is much better for the world than the real thing. Back when I wasn't so creaky, I played sports all the time. In high school I played football, where you get to hit other people and play in front of large crowds. In college I rowed on the crew team, where you inflict all the pain on yourself, and you do it in obscurity.

Sunday, 16 July 2017 06:00

Gold Medal Dreams

Well, I finally had a dream where I wasn’t caught using a toilet right in the middle of the Mall of America. I was at the Summer Olympics in South Africa (“South Africa never hosted an Olympics,” you say? Well, those kinds of things don’t stop my dreams.) Somehow, I…
Friday, 22 January 2016 12:41

Young Again

I had a dream the other night. I was back in high school, and we traveled to a rival team's field for a football game. Somewhere in the back of my mind, I think I was excited to be young again. However, my eagerness to get on the field deflated…
Thursday, 13 November 2014 12:31

I Had a Dream

Yesterday, a friend had shared a video of a ridiculous crew race, something so chaotic I couldn’t help but cry while leaving my lungs almost totally devoid of air. ‘How could people screw something up that bad?’ I thought. I was still chuckling about it last night while I was…